Crazy..

Hi folx. So I’m talking to a Gender Therapist in 12 hours for the first time. Since my talk therapist had to drop me as a patient, I’ve had no professional to talk to. And I think I’ve suffered for it. There have been times in the last few weeks that I have felt that

Gloom, Despair, and Agony on me..

Hi. I’m sorry I haven’t been very diligent with posting. To be frank I am suffering through a depression and a bit of a crisis. As many Transgender people do, I have moments of feeling like I’m playing dressup. I don’ty feel comfortable wearing women’s’ clothing and presenting female yet. And I feel phony wearing

Escape to Boob Mountain

Hello everyone. It’s ya girl, Helena. So here I am on Day 3 of my HRT journey. I had a funny reaction to the Estradiol and Spironolactone. I felt like I had really acid stomach, and a 1 day flu like symptom. I split up my dosing as the first doses I took together. I

Reflections

Hello all! It’s been a while since I posted. I went to my Hormone Replacement Therapy appointment on Monday the 23rd. I was an interesting experience. I had a lot of different feelings on that day and it’s taken me awhile to process all of them. I went to a new local provider, Equitas Health.

Cha…cha…changes!

Welcome back my friends. I hope you are all doing well in this dark time. I hope little glints of light are making their way through. As you know, State and Local governments are locking us down in an effort to stop the coronavirus from swamping the medical establishment. This has lead the schools to

The New Normal

Hi folks it’s me again, your girl Helena. I have, like many of you, been watching the coverage of our country mobilizing to fight COVID-19. The governor of my state has closed bars and restaurants to sit in business, although drive through or counter service seems ok. Many Trans people are all a twitter (some

Coronavirus

Hello my lovlies, It’s Helena. Your source of middle aged Transgirlness is back with more talk about our modern world. Ok, as I mentioned before I have a school aged child. Well the inevitable happened. Their school is out until April 4th by government order. As I am not yet out to them, this puts

U-G-L-Y, you ain’t got no alibi…

So today I wanted blather on about how ugly I am. Before you worry I am doing negative self talk, this is about self perception. I have always felt different than everyone thought I should. I have always felt awkward. Constantly saying or thinking the wrong thing. And when I looked into the mirror I

Doing the doctor tango

Hi folks! Been a bit, so I thought I’d give a quick update. So, I have been doing some more self care. I have decided to have work done on my left arm, which is suffering from neuropathy. I also have started getting my  cholesterol under control. I didn’t know it but my levels are

Back again

I have been away for a bit. My Dysphoria has flared up and I’ve been rather depressed. I feel like I am not makeing any progress and I have few friends. I know this is a normal state of affairs when you are only partially out and haven’t started HRT. I don’t know… I just